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Every Day is Precious: Cleaning the sock drawer
By ROB PAYNE
For Williamson A.M.
We've known Judy since we moved to Nashville. Marcy met Judy at our church where both our children came for mother's morning out. Our daughters are the same age. When the girls met, both were so young, neither could pronounce Judy's daughter's name. Each said ''Kenzie'' instead of ''McKenzie'' and that's what we call her eight years later. Two-year-olds don't have many playmates. More friends usually come later when they go to school. I think the same is true of mothers of 2-year-olds: it can be hard to find friends who want to hang out with a two year old unless you have one yourself. So Marcy and Judy became friends. During a health crisis you learn just how good your friends are. There is an old put-off that goes something like ''I can't go out with you I have to clean out my sock drawer.'' Or ''I can't do what you want me to do I have to clean out my sock drawer.'' Of course, if you are saying it, it means that whatever task the other person wants you to do is of lesser importance than your most miniscule task. If you've ever cleaned out your sock drawer, you know it's not fun. It's not that the job is that difficult, it just feels like you should be doing something more productive. There always seems to be something more urgent and /or important to do. Like keeping the kids from fighting, feeding the family or curing cancer. You put the sock drawer off and put it off and put it off. I hate to admit it, but I have even bought more socks so I didn't have to mate the single ones that have collected over time. A couple of years ago, when Marcy was still able to use her walker, Judy called and said, ''I'm coming over to visit Marcy.'' Marcy thought it was going to be a nice little friendly chat but as soon as she got to the house, Judy said, ''OK, I'm here. What can I do?'' Not ''Can I do anything for you?'' but ''What can I do?'' Judy wasn't going to leave until she did something. Marcy, half jokingly, said, ''You can clean out my sock drawer.'' ''Where is it?'' Judy asked. And it was done. ''What's next?'' After the sock drawer, Judy washed clothes, cleaned out the Tupperware cabinet (matching lids to bottoms) and cleaned out the hall closet. She even organized the pantry, removing all the empty containers the kids leave after they have consumed the contents. (Does this only happen at our house?) To this day, she calls and comes regularly. She does the things that no one in our house or in most houses have time to do. I've never asked, but I suspect she does things for us that she doesn't have time to do for herself or her family at home. Everybody needs a Judy especially a family going through an unusual time. If you know a person or family in need, consider going to their house and cleaning out their sock drawers. Joining their socks may be a good way to join your hearts.
Every Day Is Precious is a column to remind us to treat everyone we see today as if it could be the last time we see them. It is written by Rob Payne, whose wife, Marcy, was diagnosed with ALS (Lou Gehrig's disease) in August of 2000. Now 40 years old, she has gone from winning 5 and 10K races to being quadriplegic and on a ventilator at home. For more ways to help others, to find more about Marcy, or to receive email updates on her condition, visit www.EveryDayIsPrecious.com. Readers may contribute to her care by sending donations to Every Day Is Precious, 2051 Harvington Drive, Franklin, TN, 37069. If you have helped someone without being asked, or know of someone who has, share it with others. Send to rob@everydayisprecious.com or to Every Day Is Precious, 2051 Harvington Drive, Franklin, TN. 37069.
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